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Tag Archive for 'white house'

Ah Yes. It’s Time For Spin And The “New Message” Of The White House

Published by Daisy on January 21, 2010 in General Political Mockery. 6 Comments Tags: , , , , , , , .

Because of COURSE this is all going to be about spinning what happened on Tuesday. Obama’s a marketing genius, right?

In the wake of Tuesday night’s GOP victory, there are all sorts of theories about how Democrats are going to proceed now. This video poses the question that we’ve already discussed here on this site – are Obama and buddies going to bend a little more to the right? Or are they going to hunker down, plow ahead, and be more “feisty and aggressive?” This video, as well as Mock’s previous entry, points directly to the latter, of course. And, I don’t doubt that the Dems just don’t get it at all.

This video amused me – mainly because it’s trying to pinpoint what the left will do next – when we all know damn well what they’ll do. They’ll spin. They’ll campaign some more. And they’ll try to act like they give a rat’s ass about the people who booted Coakley out of office. This is seen around the 2:15 mark, when they show the poster boys of smug, Axelrod and Gibbs, giving their two cents. Apparently, their focus now – their “new message” – is to try to show Americans that they understand their anger and frustration. Uh huh. They’re playing THAT card now, after a year of discounting the very Americans that ultimately caused the heartburn they suffered on Tuesday night.

Unfreakinbelievable.

Brilliant plan, don’t you think? Because, let’s face it, we’re all a bunch of stupid, teabagging rednecks that can’t see through the magic of marketing spin. It’s just too much for our pea-sized brains to comprehend…

They’re really sneaky and clever, those Obama boys…

You know who Axelrod and Gibbs remind me of?

These guys:

Hey Everyone – Tighten Your Wallets! The Obamas Have To Throw Parties Every Three Days.

Published by Daisy on January 14, 2010 in General Political Mockery. 9 Comments Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , .

You know that old saying of “do as I say, not as I do?” The Obamas must really love that saying.

According to the Pundit and Ohio Congressman Bob Latta this morning, in Bo’s first year as President, he and FLOTUS have basically thrown an average of one party every three days.

Latta’s quote (and “Ms. Rogers” is Desiree Rogers, the Social Secretary):
Let the good times roll” – and roll they have at the Obama White House, while nearly 11% of the workforce remains unemployed, nearly four million Americans are losing their homes, and terrorists ride the open skies.

In fact, according to the Chicago Tribune, the stylish Ms. Rogers and the party-hearty First Couple hosted no less than 170 parties and social events through December 3 of 2009. And that does not even include the 17 parties and 11 open houses – feting more than 50,000 guests – ABC News reported the Obamas hosted throughout the Holiday Season.

For those not counting, that means by January, 2010, Ms. Rogers had staged one gala White House event every three days throughout the first year of the Obama Administration, making the once austere Executive Mansion look more like party central.

Wow. It’s like having Studio 57 right down the hall from your bedroom every three days. I wonder who’s paying for it? Huh.

And, let’s not even mention the lavish vacations they’ve taken. You know, when I’m working two jobs and haven’t had a vacation in years. But I guess that’s neither here nor there when you’re waaaaay above the commoners and all.

Make sure you keep tightening your belts for that common good, everyone! Hope and change. Awww yeah.

More Brilliance From This Administration…

Published by Daisy on January 7, 2010 in General Political Mockery. 7 Comments Tags: , , , , , .

So, you know that whole Obama administration decision to prosecute 9/11 terrorist scumbags in civilian court? Yeah. Not only is it insane, but it’s going to cost a lot of money. Not that Obama and his buddies give a rat’s ass, but it’s going to cost “more than $400 million to provide security if the pre-trial preparation and trial of the suspects in the Sept. 11 terror attacks takes two years, which insiders say is virtually certain, according to New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg.”

Oh yeah, and if the trial goes beyond 2 years (which we all know it will, since lawyers like to draaaaaag things out as much as humanly possible), it’ll cost another projected $206 million annually.

And then there’s the whole resourcing issue. They’ll take normal, every day crime-fighting resources off the street of NYC to help with the trial, of course. And on top of that, there’s security. Which will be completely insane.

“Security is expected to include the closure of many streets around the court house, a very heavy uniformed police presence, snipers, heavy weapons teams, undercover police officers and a massive federal and local intelligence and counter terror operation.”

I’m sure that won’t cost any money, either. Nah.

Of course, they’re saying that New York taxpayers should not – and hopefully will not – get stuck with the bill on this. Because it’s a FEDERAL issue. And, that means that when it all comes down to it, we’re ALL stuck with the damn bill. I mean, the last time I checked, I pay federal taxes. I assume you do, too.

I guess when you’re used to spending like a drunken sailor on a 3-day binge, this kind of money seems like chump change. Funny how this administration talks about finding ways to scrimp and save in healthcare, yet this priority of theirs seems to be a viable expense.

Hope and change. Aw yeah.

Bo’s Crappy Appointees Are Becoming My Yawnfest

Published by Daisy on January 2, 2010 in General Political Mockery. 2 Comments Tags: , , , , .

It’s becoming such an everyday thing – Bo appointing someone who is a complete joke or better in line with him – a Grade-A liar.

Enter Erroll Southers, the White House’s gem of a pick for head of the Transportation Security Administration. First, he tells the Congress that he didn’t have a hand in accessing documentation about his estranged wife’s boyfriend 20 years ago. Then, after the initial vote securing him a spot, he all of a sudden remembered – wait a second, I DID have something to do with that.

Convenient how that works.

I know I should be outraged, but lying is such a cornerstone of this administration, that frankly, I’m just yawning over it at this point. I’m only outraged at the people who still believe that this administration has any integrity at all – that anything emerging from its huge, gaping piehole holds any truth in it whatsoever. I guess I’m naive that way. I mean, NO magic Kool-Aid tastes that good, people.

Aaaaaand, the hits just keep on coming…

Chris McTingly Legs – Another Shining Example Of What The White House Deems “Real Journalism”

Published by Daisy on December 2, 2009 in General Political Mockery. 5 Comments Tags: , , , , .

In this clip full of brilliance, Chris McObamaManCrush calls Dick Cheney a “troll.” I’d just like to point out once again that this is what the White House believes is journalistic prowess, people.

You know what I’d really like to see? McTinglyLegs say this directly to Dick’s face. That would be funny – long after the 2.5 seconds it would take for Cheney to flatten this nimrod with his troll-like pinky finger.

Obama To America: Private Sector? We Don’t Need No Stinkin’ Private Sector!

Published by Daisy on November 26, 2009 in General Political Mockery. 4 Comments Tags: , , , , .

A clever and competent reader sent this to me today. I thought it was more than interesting.

The American reported that:
J.P. Morgan recently issued research that “examines the prior private sector experience of the cabinet officials since 1900 that one might expect a president to turn to in seeking advice about helping the economy. It includes secretaries of State, Commerce, Treasury, Agriculture, Interior, Labor, Transportation, Energy, and Housing & Urban Development, and excludes Postmaster General, Navy, War, Health, Education & Welfare, Veterans Affairs, and Homeland Security—432 cabinet members in all.”

I think the chart does a nice job of painting the picture for us all:

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So, hey all you job seekers out there! If you have absolutely no real experience whatsoever in your chosen industry, Obama’s got a job for you. I assume he’s taking applications right now – you can send them to Pennsylvania Avenue. Hell, he may not even require an application.

Hello, White House? This Is The New York Times. Yeah – Even WE Think This Fox News War Is Dumb.

Published by Mockarena on October 19, 2009 in Really?. 4 Comments Tags: , , , .

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According to the NEW YORK TIMES, which is like the antithesis of Fox News, the White House miiiiight want to reconsider this whole stand-off with their cable news opponent.

I’m serious.  The New York Times is even saying it now.  And, while it’s obvious that they kind of hate to say it, they say it nonetheless, because at this point you pretty much have to be a complete moron not to realize that a presidential spat with a cable channel is probably not the best way to demonstrate good leadership.

There are a couple of real zingers in the article.  My favorites include:

“While there is undoubtedly a visceral thrill in finally setting out after your antagonists, the history of administrations that have successfully taken on the media and won is shorter than this sentence.”

“So far, the only winner in this latest dispute seems to be Fox News. Ratings are up 20 percent this year, and the network basked for a week in the antagonism of a sitting president.”

“It could all be written off as a sideshow, but it may present a genuine problem for Mr. Obama, who took great pains during the campaign to depict himself as being above the fray of over-heated partisan squabbling. In his victory speech he promised, ‘I will listen to you, especially when we disagree.’”

“And the administration, by deploying official resources against a troublesome media organization, seems to have brought a knife to a gunfight.”

The article closes with a mention of a blog called “Reality Check” which is part of the official White House website.   It apparently exists for no other purpose than to list all of the falsehoods it claims are attributable to Fox News.  And in the final blow, the New York Times says this:

“As it is, Reality Check sounds a bit like the blog of some unemployed guy living in his parents’ basement, not an official communiqué from Pennsylvania Avenue.  The American presidency was conceived as a corrective to the royals, but trading punches with cable shouters seems a bit too common. Perhaps it’s time to restore a little imperiousness to the relationship.”

I can’t believe I’m saying this, but well said, New York Times.  Well said.

Obama Continues To Be Terrified Of Fox News

Published by Mockarena on October 12, 2009 in Really?. 13 Comments Tags: , , , .

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The New York Times has an interesting update on the never-ending spat between the White House and The Fox News Channel (FNC).

The White House communications director, Anita Dunn, said this weekend, ”We’re going to treat them the way we would treat an opponent.  As they are undertaking a war against Barack Obama and the White House, we don’t need to pretend that this is the way that legitimate news organizations behave.”

Wow.  Is there any wonder why Chris Wallace said, after being rebuffed during Obama’s news show extravaganzathon a few weeks ago, that Obama’s administration was ”the biggest bunch of crybabies I have dealt with in my 30 years in Washington”? I mean, COME ON.  You cannot, with any credibility, say that, for example,  MSNBC is “a legitimate news organization” and then claim otherwise about FNC.  You just can’t.

Here’s the thing.  Whenever the White House gets its panties in a twist over FNC, the FNC ratings skyrocket.  So it’s not like FNC is freaking out over this or anything.  In fact, I would submit to you that they’re kind of reveling in it a little, which, honestly, they SHOULD.  Obama’s giving them all sorts of clout and power by claiming that they have none, and he looks foolish to avoid them, and by extension the millions of Americans who watch them.

It’s kind of cutting off your nose to spite your face, really.  If you want to change the minds or convince or sway people to believe in you and your policies, isn’t it kind of a good idea to use a platform which REACHES the people you’re trying to sway?

Huh.

Published by Mockarena on September 13, 2009 in Really?. 7 Comments Tags: , , , , .

So, you know how Democrats and the White House are all in a tizzy over the “You LIE!” outburst from Wednesday night?

Well, according to this, late Friday night the White House declared, for the first time, its intent to back a special provision which would require proof of citizenship before someone could enroll in the public option.   

Wow.  That’s a novel idea, isn’t it?

I just think it’s hilarious that they feigned outrage over being accused of lying about this very issue, when in fact it turned out they WERE lying, and now they’re covering their bases by changing up the bill to fix what they claimed they weren’t lying about in the first place.

Kinda like when they took the death panel stuff out of the bill, after being outraged that people were accusing them of having death panel stuff in the bill.

Why does anyone still trust them at all?  WHY?

Another Mensa-Worthy Celebrity Decides To Get Political

Published by Daisy on September 9, 2009 in Really?. 8 Comments Tags: , , , , , , .

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You’ve GOT to be kidding me with this crap.

Another celebrity-Obamabot is going to more than likely meet with the Almighty One at the White House. This time, it’s the reputable (hey there, Heidi Fleiss) and educated (graduate high school much?) Charlie Sheen, who is “demanding” to meet with the President to discuss how the federal government was behind the 9/11 attacks. You know, because he’s an expert on political stuff and life and not being a complete scumbag and all.

He did an interview with PrisonPlanet.com, and spewed a 20-minute “imaginary discussion” that he envisions having with Obama, including prolific gems like “the official 9/11 story is a fraud” and the attacks were the “pretext for the systematic dismantling of our Constitution and Bill of Rights,” and that “the Bush/Cheney regime was behind the attacks.”

This is the same guy whose ex-wife, when divorcing the wackjob him, stated that “he was addicted to gambling, prescription drugs and prostitutes” and was, well, “delusional.”

Then she was granted a restraining order against him.

But, yeah. Bo will accept the meeting. I mean, how could he resist, right?

Hope and Change and Transparency? Um, Nice Try.

Published by Daisy on July 2, 2009 in General Political Mockery. 1 Comment Tags: , , , .

You know what I hate? When people promise things and don’t deliver. You know what else I hate? When people pretend to be something they’re not.

Enter the Obama administration and the notion of open government. The Anointed One has promised a new era of openness and transparency (and hope and change and sunshine as fringe benefits, of course).  He’s promised this a lot.  In fact, it was an integral part of his campaign while he was slamming the Bush administration for being “secretive,” and since he’s still technically campaigning (I mean, let’s just call it what it is, people), you’d think he’d at least fake it to look like he was actually staying true to his word. 

Yeah.  Not so much.

The stimulus bill was the first example of false transparency.  No one had time to read it, and it swiftly went through the Senate.  And, now we’ve seen Cap and Tax fly through the House without anyone reading that.  Then there’s the climate bill, porked out beyond belief – even a fair number of Democrats are shaking their heads at it.  And now, the Obama Administration is being sued for a lack of transparency on the White House Visitor Logs.  Huh.

The point here is that Obama’s promise of open government and transparency is a big, fat, sham. What I find interesting is that many liberals will still contend that Obama is all about change and hope and openness, when he’s clearly secretive and exclusive and anything BUT transparent.

Here is a clip on the lack of Obama’s transparency direct from CNN – not Fox – just to perpetuate the notion of fair and balanced snarkiness, of course.

Transparency, shmansparency…what a joke:

White House Can’t Name A Country Where A Single-Payer System Actually Works

Published by Daisy on June 19, 2009 in General Political Mockery. 3 Comments Tags: , , , .

That Gibbs.  He’s a hoot.

Here he is, talking in circles again when asked about where a single-payer healthcare system actually works.  He can’t seem to name one.  I’m shocked, too.

Obama Celebrates “Five Of Four” Without His Teleprompter

Published by Daisy on May 6, 2009 in General Political Mockery. 4 Comments Tags: , , , , , .

My Cinco de Mayo was awesome.  Mainly because it was Cinco de Mayo and not some make-believe holiday called “Five of Four.”

Yet again, clever and competent readers, I give you our POTUS sans his trusty teleprompter.

Next Up – Lindsay Lohan As Press Secretary

Published by Daisy on April 7, 2009 in Really?. 5 Comments Tags: , , , , , , , , , , .

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Kal Penn is going to work in Obama’s administration. Kal Penn. The Harold and Kumar dude. The dude that’s holding the panties in the picture above. The young actor dude. Yeah. That one.

According to this blog entry, he “killed” his role on the show House so he could take a job at the White House.

His statement:
I was incredibly honored a couple of months ago to get the opportunity to go work in the White House. I got to know the president and some of the staff during the campaign and had expressed interest in working there, so I’m going to be the associate director in the White House office of public liaison. They do outreach with the American public and with different organizations. They’re basically the front door of the White House. They take out all of the red tape that falls between the general public and the White House. It’s similar to what I was doing on the campaign.

Well, alrighty then. I got nothing.

A Sleeved Michelle Obama Overshadows All First Ladies Before Her By Digging Holes On The White House Lawn

Published by Daisy on March 23, 2009 in General Political Mockery. 4 Comments Tags: , , , , , , , .

Never mind the fact that the current administration is driving our economy into the ground. The First Lady is tilling it. Well, kind of. I mean, I think she just moved some sod around while a bunch of kids did most of the work. This is huge news, people. Just in case you didn’t see it this past weekend on a gazillion different channels and on every major online news source, Michelle Obama has spearheaded a groundbreaking (pun intended) initiative to create an organic garden on the White House lawn. To promote healthy eating via locally-grown produce, the garden has been touted as a symbolic weapon in the fight against increasing obesity in this country. What’s comical to me is the press coverage this warranted. I mean, it’s as if no one has ever planted a garden. Ever. Anywhere. (I actually planted one this weekend myself, but I did it sans the help of a bunch of child labor and without CNN filming me. Go figure.)

So, yeah. In the midst of our economic apocalypse, we have a new White House garden. And God bless Jimmy Kimmel to use this as an excuse to make a Clinton-ho joke…

Mrs. Obama is Also Subject to Media Deification…Go Figure

Published by Daisy on March 19, 2009 in Really?. 2 Comments Tags: , , , , , .

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You know what I think sucks? When the media paints the Obamas as the first people to actually do ANYTHING in office. As if they thought of every politically-charged idea all on their own, without any history of any good-doing since the beginning of time. It’s as if everyone who preceded them was completely oblivious to American citizens and various causes surrounding them. Case in point: Michelle Obama is settling into her new role as First Lady, and you know what’s she’s chosen as her pet cause? What she refers to as one of “America’s most deserving causes – our military families.” OK, that’s a cool pet project. I can get on board with that.

(Oh, but by the way, I find the timing amusing, seeing as how her hubby just back-pedaled on having private insurance companies, instead of the Veterans Affairs Department, pay for veterans’ service-related injuries. You think that would be a bad idea, Mr. President? Really? Are you sure about that? )

So, yeah, back to the First Lady being all caring and compassionate about the military and its families. The Wall Street Journal did a great article on how her new plan to provide “military family support” is being reported (by our friendly mainstream media, of course) as this revolutionary idea. Her compassion is just plain innovative and groundbreaking. Mrs. Obama’s social secretary went as far as to say, “one idea Michelle had was to have an event for military families — here they are sacrificing so much for the country and many of them probably have never been invited to the White House.”

Really? Are you sure, Ms. Obama’s Secretary?  Probably is a good word to use.  I mean, it’s just ambiguous enough to make it that much easier to say you didn’t actually lie when called out on the big fat lie in the future. 

What wasn’t recognized – at all – was that Laura Bush has been doing this during her last 8 years as First Lady. The Wall Street Journal supports this when they write:

“This uncritical reportage does Laura Bush an injustice. In hundreds of ways — picnics on the South Lawn, fund-raising for scholarships for the children of sailors on the USS Texas, unheralded visits with the wounded and families of the fallen, the work she did for military kids under her Helping America’s Youth initiative — Mrs. Bush showed our troops and their loved ones how close they were to her heart.”

The Journal went on to say,

“This Stepford Wife treatment was on embarrassing display in a recent New York Times profile of Mrs. Obama. “[I]n a departure from her predecessor,” gushed the Times, “Mrs. Obama has also begun promoting bills that support her husband’s policy priorities.”

Yeah, that whole “departure” thing is kind of a lie, too.  But, who’s counting, right?

So, to recap. Laura Bush has mega-class. And the media should suck it.

It’s Been Six Weeks, And Obama Is Sleepy And Would Like A Vacation Now

Published by Daisy on March 9, 2009 in General Political Mockery. 9 Comments Tags: , , , , , , .

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Obama’s exhausted. At least this is the impression that Great Britain now has after their Prime Minister, Gordon Brown, was greeted with a less-than-stellar welcome to the White House last week. This comes direct from the UK paper, The Telegraph. You can read it in its entirety here.

I’ll give you my own abstract of the article. Obama’s been staying up too late and partying too much with Stevie Wonder and other B-list celebrities to actually deal with the pomp and circumstance and diplomacy to which Mr. Brown and Britain have become accustomed.

Here are a few of my favorite little tidbits from the article:

“Allies of Mr. Obama say his weary appearance in the Oval Office with Mr. Brown illustrates the strain he is now under, and the president’s surprise at the sheer volume of business that crosses his desk.”

…”Obama is overwhelmed. There is a zero sum tension between his ability to attend to the economic issues and his ability to be a proactive sculptor of the national security agenda.”

“…the mood music of the event was at times strained. Mr. Brown handed over carefully selected gifts, including a pen holder made from the wood of a warship that helped stamp out the slave trade – a sister ship of the vessel from which timbers were taken to build Mr. Obama’s Oval Office desk. Mr. Obama’s gift in return, a collection of Hollywood film DVDs that could have been bought from any high street store, looked like the kind of thing the White House might hand out to the visiting head of a minor African state.

So, let’s recap, shall we? Obama is tired and seemingly overwhelmed by the unexpected amount of work that the free leader of the world has to do (unexpected….REALLY?), he is not a very hospitable host, he has issues with multitasking, and he gives tacky gifts to important people.

Diplomacy, shiplomacy. We should really cut him some slack. I mean, it’s not like the Prime Minister of Great Britain is someone important like Bono or Earth, Wind, and Fire.