Advertisement

Archive for the 'General Political Mockery' Category

I Need To Weigh In On The Whole “Retarded” Controversy.

Published by Mockarena on February 4, 2010 in General Political Mockery. 14 Comments Tags: , , , , .

You guys probably read Daisy’s post the other day about Rahm Emanuel calling some folks “f***in’ retarded,” and the firestorm that resulted. It’s been big news. Sarah Palin is furious and wants him fired, all kinds of disabled people showed up at the White House to talk about it, Rahm then apologized to the CEO of the Special Olympics – it’s basically been a non-stop flurry of activity. It’s probably not anywhere close to being over. There will likely be more apologies and more analysis and more outrage.

And frankly, you guys, at the risk of alienating readers and creating a smaller version of a firestorm right here at COTR, I think this whole matter is completely retarded.

Yeah, I said it.

I feel I’m uniquely positioned to comment on this issue, since as you may know if you’re a reader of The Mock Dock, my eldest son is severely mentally retarded. I don’t bother with saying words like “intellectually challenged” or “mentally disabled” or whatever the politically correct words are nowadays. Junior Mock has cerebral palsy, and not only is he a quadriplegic, he’s also mentally retarded. Fact.

Now, far be it for me to DEFEND a liberal leftist moron like Rahm Emanuel (wait – can I still say “moron?”), but the fact that I AM should assure you folks on the left that I’m dead serious about this. Rahm is despicable in many many ways, but frankly, I don’t believe he meant any disrespect to Actual Mentally Retarded People when he made his comment. Do a search on “retarded” at The Mock Dock, and you’ll find me using that word to refer to everything from hot pink thigh-high boots, to Heidi Montag to ugly sunglasses. It’s a word that has been colloquialized, for better or for worse. And it’s the same with the word “gay.” There’s this all-out campaign to remove the slang use of those words from the American vernacular, and what I want to know is, WHAT IS THE BIG FREAKING DEAL? Can we all just lighten up already?

My sister informed me today, when we were discussing this, that it’s bad to say, “Let’s just call a spade a spade” because apparently “spade” is now a derogatory term to describe a black person. SERIOUSLY??? I didn’t even KNOW that. Have we really gotten to the point where we’re all going to have to start carrying around a pocket handbook which lists all the words that could potentially offend someone? Because I can’t keep up with this nonsense.

I get that Sarah Palin is a relatively new mom to a child with Down’s Syndrome, and so she felt like perhaps she ought to speak out against Rahm on this issue. But it just seems to me that there are bigger fish to fry. I mean, on the Pressing Issue List for our nation, possibly offending someone who’s overly sensitive to the word “retarded” seems kinda low on the totem pole (no offense to any American Indians out there).

I’m just sick of political correctness, you guys. SICK of it. That doesn’t mean I’m going to run out and start saying the n-word or the c-word or any of those other truly offensive words. But let’s call a spade a spade. This whole “I’m offended therefore I am” crap has gotten out of control. And when you start needing more than a 1/2 sheet of paper to list out words that are offensive to the general public, there’s a problem.

/End Rant.

You Know What You Should Totally Do, If You Haven’t Already?

Published by Mockarena on February 4, 2010 in General Political Mockery. 1 Comment Tags: .

You should buy a Hunks On The Right calendar.  You know – by clicking on the picture in the top right hand corner of the site.  GUESS WHAT!  The price has been reduced to $10!  How awesome is that?

Remember when the calendar was featured in the Indianapolis Star?  And there was like 3/4 of a page devoted to it?  THAT is how awesome of a calendar it is.  And if you don’t have one yet, you are totally missing out.

Plus, if you buy one, the money benefits our local Tea Party organization.  So it’s like a win-win all the way around.

Take advantage of the price cut and order one today!  Woot!

Awwww, Joe. We Missed You, You Goofy Old Man, You.

Published by Daisy on February 3, 2010 in General Political Mockery. 1 Comment Tags: , , , , .

I really have missed him. I mean, how can you not just want to put your arm around him, get him in a headlock, and give this guy a great big noogie? Honestly.

Behold the brilliance that is Joey McMensa, talking about the neat science fiction movie thingy that is called Avatar, I think? Next thing you know, he’s going to be talking about how much he loves that thing in his office that he’s not quite sure what it is, but lovingly refers to as that “Space-Like-Google-Machine.”

Wow. I’m just going to quickly remind everyone – this guy is the Vice President of the United States of America.

Sweet dreams, readers!

You Know What I Think Is Kind Of Hilarious?

Published by Daisy on February 3, 2010 in General Political Mockery. 2 Comments Tags: , , , , , , , , , , .

The lovefest for Obama that we’ve witnessed over the past year. Behold a nice little recap of that lovefest here:

And now? A little over a year later? ABC’s Jake Tapper is asking why in the heck Obama can’t “man up” and make tough, presidential-type decisions.

You know, I’m not exactly sure about this, but I think, in his own little way, Mr. Tapper just questioned whether or not the President has Actual Testicles. Yep.

Wow….what a difference a year, an inflamed ego, absolutely zero experience whatsoever, broken promises galore and a raging deficit can make, huh?

Just In Case You Forgot – McBotox Is Better Than You.

Published by Daisy on February 3, 2010 in General Political Mockery. 4 Comments Tags: , , , , , , , , .

It’s hilarious when people like her think that they’re better than others. Not so hilarious, though, when she’s living the fantasy on taxpayers’ dimes.

According to this, McBotox is spending MILLIONS of our money to use military aircraft as her own personal family airline. “Her kids, in-laws and grandchildren are utilizing entire military passenger jets for their routine travel needs…Military flights cost between $5-$20 thousand dollars per hour to operate. Pelosi only reimburses the government between $120-$400 per flight. You and I pick up the rest of the tab with our tax dollars.”

I guess she does know where to cut costs. Or steal them. Whichever semantics you choose to use, I suppose.

Yay hope, change, and pickpocketing the American taxpayer so you can pretend you’re the Queen!

Holy HAG.

Obama Says This Administration Is The Most Transparent In Modern Era. And Again, Monkeys Fly Out Of My Assular Area.

Published by Daisy on February 3, 2010 in General Political Mockery. 4 Comments Tags: , , , , , , , .

I love the first statement he makes the best: “I have to be careful about grading myself.”

God, that’s funny.

And after he says that this is the most transparent administration in the modern era, a strange phenomenon occurred. He started sounding like the teacher in The Peanuts cartoon, and then I laughed. Again.

Behold the comic gold, everyone. And happy Wednesday:

Let’s All Look At The Pretty Pictures, Shall We?

Published by Daisy on February 2, 2010 in General Political Mockery. 3 Comments Tags: , , , , , , , , , .

You know what I love? Graphs.

Well, most of the time, anyway.

Courtesy of The Republican Caucus Committee of the Budget, there’s an interesting document that says a lot of financial stuff. A lot of economic talk that frankly depresses me a little bit. So, I prefer to just look at the pictures to get to the point quickly. Kind of like ripping off a band-aid.

The gist:
Much like last year, the President’s fiscal year 2011 budget presents a staggering contradiction to his recent rhetorical gestures toward “fiscal restraint.” It continues pursuing a “progressive” ideology that calls for ever-more centralized government control of the economy. It spends too much, taxes too much, and borrows too much – and the result is a growing debt that drains the resources needed for growth and job creation, undermining any pretense of economic “stimulus.” Moreover, the budget adds to an already unsustainable outlook that threatens to overwhelm the budget, smother the economy, and sacrifice the prosperity of future generations. The President’s budget more than doubles the debt; pushes this year’s deficit to a new record of $1.6 trillion; drives spending to a new record of $3.8 trillion in fiscal year 2011; and raises taxes by more than $2 trillion through 2020, under the administration’s own estimates.

Aaaand, the pretty pictures to back it up:

The new Obama budget doubling the debt picture:

The debt that’ll be held by the public picture:

And last but not least, the deficit under democratic budgets picture:

Quick and hopefully a little less painful than what we’ll actually be feeling over the next few years.

Yay fiscal responsibility and that whole control-spending thing!

Yeah, riiiiight.

Deep Thoughts. By Obama Sans Teleprompter.

Published by Daisy on February 2, 2010 in General Political Mockery. 9 Comments Tags: , , , , , .

Obama did some town hall at the University of South Florida, and a female student asked him a “tough question” (according to the YouTube video description anyway). She asked him why he “has not paid enough attention to the plight of the Palestinians and remains sided with Israel and Egypt.”

His answer sans teleprompting?

“The Middle East is obviously an issue that has plagued the region for centuries.”

That’s some deep crap there, people. I’ll let you soak it in for a few minutes…

You’re welcome.

And they boo’d HER. Funny how that works. Huh.

More Of That Compassion Stuff From The Party Of Political Correctness…

Published by Daisy on February 2, 2010 in General Political Mockery. 12 Comments Tags: , , , , .

Remember that whole Special-Olympics thing that Obama so nonchalantly slung around on the Jay Leno show back in March? Basically, he was an insensitive jerk.

And now, his buddy Rahm is on the same wavelength. According to this, Emmanuel openly called liberal democrats “F—ing retarded.”

Nice, huh?

Sarah Palin had this comment to make on her Facebook page:

I would ask the president to show decency in this process by eliminating one member of that inner circle, Mr. Rahm Emanuel, and not allow Rahm’s continued indecent tactics to cloud efforts. Yes, Rahm is known for his caustic, crude references about those with whom he disagrees, but his recent tirade against participants in a strategy session was such a strong slap in many American faces that our president is doing himself a disservice by seeming to condone Rahm’s recent sick and offensive tactic.

The Obama Administration’s Chief of Staff scolded participants, calling them, “F—ing retarded,” according to several participants, as reported in the Wall Street Journal.

Just as we’d be appalled if any public figure of Rahm’s stature ever used the “N-word” or other such inappropriate language, Rahm’s slur on all God’s children with cognitive and developmental disabilities – and the people who love them – is unacceptable, and it’s heartbreaking.

A patriot in North Andover, Massachusetts, notified me of Rahm’s “retarded” slam. I join this gentleman, who is the father of a beautiful child born with Down Syndrome, in asking why the Special Olympics, National Down Syndrome Society and other groups condemning Rahm’s degrading scolding have been completely ignored by the White House. No comment from his boss, the president?

Of course, Emanuel has since “apologized” for his remark, which is another complete joke of a statement and the White House spewed some garbage about how they’re committed to the advancement of people with mental disabilities or some complete crap like that – that they obviously don’t mean.

The lack of sincerity is palpable, really.

Hey Dems – your hypocrisy is showing. AGAIN.

GAWD.

Obama Greets The Mayor Of Tampa

Published by Mockarena on February 1, 2010 in General Political Mockery. 4 Comments Tags: .

Seriously.  Enough already.

Now, lest you think I Actually Believe that Obama believes he should show deference to a mayor, I will just tell you right now that I don’t.  I think he’s got a chronic greeting problem, which his advisers should really nip in the bud before he makes himself look even more ridiculous than he already looks.

I think this condition should be researched and added to the DSM IV.

Ooo – I Love These Ideas

Published by Mockarena on February 1, 2010 in General Political Mockery. 1 Comment Tags: , .

I loved this article at Big Government.  In it, the author discusses Obama’s “spending freeze.”  I use quotations, because anyone with an Actual Brain realizes it’s the furthest thing from a spending freeze, and in fact, is about as fiscally responsible as buying a $500 pair of shoes on sale for $250, and not needing them to begin with, and proudly announcing to Mr. Mock that due to the sale, I saved us money.

You can read all the details and facts and figures at the source link, but what most stuck out to me was the author’s suggestions for how to ACTUALLY freeze spending and save some money.  He suggested, in part,  the following:

1.  No increase in spending in ANY program and ALL government salaries frozen for the next two years.
2. All new hiring frozen except for defense.
3. All government pensions, including for Congress and the executive branch, phased out.  I LOVE this idea.  Like the author says, “If a 401k plan is good enough for the rest of us, it’s good enough for our government workers.”

    Additionally, we oughta cut income taxes across the board, as well as corporate tax rates (Newt Gingrich has long touted this measure).  When those things happen, the economy improves and revenues increase, but Democrats refuse to learn from history.  They’re smarter than history, you see.

    Anyway, I thought this was some good stuff.  It’d certainly go a long way in stopping future generations from being dumped on.  (And yes, I do mean in the way the cartoon suggests).  ;)

    Seven Minutes Worth Of Empty Or Broken Promises

    Published by Mockarena on February 1, 2010 in General Political Mockery. 1 Comment Tags: , .

    Nice little recap, wouldn’t you say?

    FLOTUS Takes On Fat

    Published by Daisy on February 1, 2010 in General Political Mockery. 13 Comments Tags: , , , , , , , , .

    I loved this Human Events article I read this morning about Michelle Obama’s new crusade against obesity. The author – I can relate to her. She sort of had me at hello, really, as her first paragraph read as follows:

    “I read in a Reuters news article that Michelle Obama has taken on obesity as a cause. Which I think pairs nicely with her “saving-the-world-one-out-of-work-corporate-lawyer-turned- organic-hippy-farmer-at-a-time” agenda she had last summer. And why shouldn’t the two causes work well together? Veggies have been known to cure fatness, and the world can always use one less lawyer. It’s a win-win.”

    This chick and I need to be friends immediately, but that’s neither here nor there.

    I’ve been a size 0, a size 8 and everywhere in between, and I’m currently the size of a “tractor-trailer,” as I’m at the final stage of growing a human being in my body at the present moment. What I’ve learned most of all in the weight game is that it’s so not about what the government can mandate for me, what Michelle Obama TELLS me to eat or not eat – it’s me deciding, day by day, meal by meal, whether or not I’m going to stick that brownie in my piehole. And whether I CHOOSE to get off my keester and go for a run. It’s a PERSONAL decision. And, it’s not something that the government – or my fellow taxpayers – should have to pay for.

    You know how Obama and friends are always talking about finding savings in various programs to pay for that monstrosity of a healthcare bill? Well, “a reported $650 million in stimulus spending has gone towards the prevention of smoking and obesity.” Um, there’s a big chunk right there, geniuses. What in the holy hell is wrong with our country when we’ve all lost that sense of personal responsibility to the point where we can’t put down the KFC and keep a damn cigarette out of our mouth? This has somehow become the government’s problem? Our collective problem? What are we teaching our kids if we spout this idea that, well, you can just shove any crap into your mouth, smoke like a chimney, drink like a fish, and abuse your body with all sorts of substances, and you know what? That’s someone else’s problem. Yeah.

    It’s just an extension of the whole “not my fault!” philosophy that we see waaaaay too much of these days – in every facet of American life. It’s what’s gotten us into the economic trouble we’re in right now, frankly.

    Here’s a newsflash: THIS IS AMERICA. NO ONE OWES YOU ANYTHING.

    Or is it?

    The author goes on to say this:
    Consider this for a moment; the U.S. government currently doles out about $150 billion a year to pay for complications related to obesity. That is taxpayer money going towards a problem that is almost entirely self-induced. We’ve got the Obama administration telling our military to pick and chose which life-saving weapons programs to give our warfighters because we don’t have the money and yet, people with Frito intake issues are getting hundreds of billions of dollars a year for insulin shots and wound debridement. That’s wrong.

    Wrong indeed.

    And then there’s the Health and Human Services Secretary under Obama who spews, “The unhealthier we are as a nation, the more our health care costs will continue to rise and the less competitive we will be globally.” Um, riiiiight. Our lack of global competitiveness lies directly on the fat laps of obese Americans. You just keep on telling yourselves that, Obama administration.

    The notion that the government can solve someone’s fatness is laughable. I mean, just look at Michael Moore and how well it’s all worked out for him – and that dude LOVES the whole government-controlling-every-facet-of-his-life idea. Michelle just needs to stick to what she knows best – billing out for her legal services at a ridiculous rate and buying overpriced organic food. The rest of us shmucks can and should be able to take care of ourselves. Just a thought. And there’s 650 million of spendiddlydimulus taxpayer money saved. Oila.

    To save another 650 million? Take RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOURSELF and put the Chips Ahoy bag down. How’s that for Monday morning reform?

    They’ve Learned Nothing. Nada. Zilch.

    Published by Daisy on February 1, 2010 in General Political Mockery. 2 Comments Tags: , , , , , , , .

    Here’s Bobby Gibbs, talking this weekend about how the Dems can STILL ram through the crappy healthcare reform they’ve pushed forth. No matter the upsets the Dems have seen, the wave of tea parties across the nation, any freakin’ poll you pick up these days, or simply what people with Actual Brains think. I mean, who cares about that whole Scott Brown thing, right? That had nothing to do with disgruntled American people not wanting crappy healthcare “reform” (and I use that term loosely). Apparently, when your brain is made of canned ham, it’s hard to see what’s directly in front of you.

    I’m actually torn now – is it complete ignorance or just arrogance? Maybe both?

    Unfreakingbelievable.

    Aaaand More Hypocrisy From That Shining Pillar Of Health, Michael Moore

    Published by Daisy on January 31, 2010 in General Political Mockery. 5 Comments Tags: , , , , , .

    This is an interesting little video that shows how Mr. Anti-Capitalist applied for, was approved for, and will receive credit for an almost 42% tax incentive from Michigan taxpayers for his film “Capitalism: A Love Story.” The same kind of tax incentive that Mr. Moore is so vehemently opposed to and spews hatred for in that movie that I believe a total of maybe three people saw in the theatres.

    I’ll be honest here (I know you’re shocked). I’m nine and a half months pregnant, so I’ve learned the art of managing my vomit reflex. But this dude – I can barely even look at him for half a millisecond without getting the uncontrollable dry heaves.

    Behold the blatant and sickening hypocrisy that is Michael Moore. A complete waste of perfectly good Twinkies.

    So, Back To That Chris Matthews Thing…

    Published by Daisy on January 31, 2010 in General Political Mockery. 5 Comments Tags: , , , , , , .

    Hey – did you white people out there know that this year has been traumatic because Obama is President? Yeah. It’s been traumatic, but that has absolutely NOTHING to do with the fact that the man is half black.

    Um….who gives a rat’s ass?

    Wait….that’s right….apparently liberals do. As seen (once again) discussed on Behar.

    I’d just like to point out, for the record, that if someone told me I was a good dancer, I’d actually take that as a compliment – and not anywhere near offensive. But that’s just me, I guess.

    And, yes. We’re still talking about this crap.

    GAWD.

    Mama Like

    Published by Mockarena on January 31, 2010 in General Political Mockery. 2 Comments Tags: , , .

    Jon Hamm played Scott Brown on SNL last night, and it was kinda hilarious.

    Brown’s reaction? “Thank goodness I like a good laugh,” he told National Review Online. “That was pretty funny. I wish I could host SNL some day. I’ve been watching it since I was young. Jon Hamm is great. He doesn’t really sound like me, but it was very funny.”

    Someone In The Climate Change Movement Lying? NO Way.

    Published by Daisy on January 30, 2010 in General Political Mockery. 4 Comments Tags: , , , , .

    Rajendra Pachauri, the chairman of the leading climate change watchdog, was told about the falsehood of melting Himalayan glaciers BEFORE the Copenhagen summit. However, he sort of neglected to say anything. In fact, he actually said that he was never told.

    Um, oops.

    The “Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change assessment that the glaciers would disappear by 2035 was wrong, but he waited two months to correct it. He failed to act despite learning that the claim had been refuted by several leading glaciologists.”

    Of course, after being called out on being a total liar, he fessed up and said he heard about it like ten days ago, adding, “That’s ridiculous. It never came to my attention before the Copenhagen summit. It wasn’t in the public sphere.”

    Turns out he was telling a little lie – one as white as the Himalayans, I guess. The Himalayan glaciers are so thick and at such high altitude that most glaciologists believe they would take several hundred years to melt at the present rate. Some are growing and many show little sign of change.

    The dude who apparently told him about the falsehood said to him, “I pointed it out [the error] to you in several e-mails, several discussions, yet you decided to overlook it. Was that so that you did not want to destabilise what was happening in Copenhagen?”

    Dr Pachauri replied: “Not at all, not at all. As it happens, we were all terribly preoccupied with a lot of events. We were working round the clock with several things that had to be done in Copenhagen. It was only when the story broke, I think in December, we decided to, well, early this month — as a matter of fact, I can give you the exact dates — early in January that we decided to go into it and we moved very fast.

    “And within three or four days, we were able to come up with a clear and a very honest and objective assessment of what had happened. So I think this presumption on your part or on the part of any others is totally wrong. We are certainly never — and I can say this categorically — ever going to do anything other than what is truthful and what upholds the veracity of science.”

    Yeah, riiiiight. In the meantime, he secured a bunch of grant money through his so-called science. And, monkeys flew out of my assular area.

    Harry McSaggyFace Learns A Harsh Reality: You Can’t Buy Friends

    Published by Daisy on January 30, 2010 in General Political Mockery. 3 Comments Tags: , , , , , , , , , , .

    According to this, Harry Reid raised $2 million in the fourth fundraising quarter. He spent $2.1 million on advertisements to make him look like less of a complete blowhard.

    With all that spending, Reid begins the new year with $8.7 million in his campaign account — a formidable sum, but less money than he banked last September. And the ads have not improved his low popularity back home, with a new Daily Kos/Research 2000 poll showing his approval rating down to 36 percent.

    And that 36 percent? It’s down seven percent from a little over a month ago.

    The Republicans running against him haven’t raised as much money as him – he’s apparently pretty good at getting people to empty their pockets for jack squat in return – but the outlook is still pretty darn good for conservatives.

    In a match-up with Reid, the GOP’s Lowden now earns 48% of the vote while Tarkanian picks up 50% of the Nevada vote against Reid. In December, both had 49% support.

    A third Republican contender, former Assemblywoman Sharron Angle, now beats Reid 44% to 40%, with 10% opting for another candidate and seven percent (7%) undecided. In the previous survey, Angle bested Reid 47% to 43% in December, while seven percent (7%) liked another candidate and three percent (3%) weren’t sure.

    If he keeps his gaping piehole shut about healthcare, that could give him another edge, I believe. However, I think people are pretty disillusioned at this point, and I think the American people are smart enough to know what made his poll numbers go down in the first place.

    I am SO looking forward to a flat-out awesome November.

    Let’s Discuss College Football Again, Shall We?

    Published by Daisy on January 29, 2010 in General Political Mockery. 13 Comments Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , .

    The National Football League, I could take or leave (sorry fellow Indy people who adore the Colts, Superbowls, and all that stuff). But I LOVE college football. I’m an SEC girl (who bleeds orange) and a Big Ten tailgater by marriage (Boiler up), and by June of every year, I’m chomping at the bit for the season to begin. It’s as if Christmas for me begins on that first college football game day and ends in December.

    Apparently, the president and I do have something in common. We both follow college football. While my obsession lies in the fun factor, his lies in the legality of the picks for Bowl games, apparently.

    In Obama’s first interview after winning the Presidency, he had this comment to make:

    “I think any sensible person would say that if you’ve got a bunch of teams who play throughout the season, and many of them have one loss or two losses—there’s no clear decisive winner—that we should be creating a playoff system,” Obama said. “I don’t know any serious fan of college football who has disagreed with me on this. So, I’m gonna throw my weight around a little bit. I think it’s the right thing to do.”

    He’s kind of obsessed with this stuff, actually. And it seems he may finally be “taking action.” So all this talk about college football and the federal government and playoff system versus ratings system has raised a few questions in my noggin:

    1. Why would the federal government need to have anything to do with freakin’ college football? Really?
    2. Um, does Obama not have better things to do with his time than to have a strong arm in investigating the legality of college football?
    3. Can you clever and competent college football fans enlighten me more as to what’s truly a better system – playoffs or ratings? And if it’s a playoff system, does that mean that my SEC team could feasibly play my husband’s Big Ten team during the regular season? (Because I’d enjoy seeing them kick my husband’s team’s butts, truth be told.)

    I know this isn’t overly political, and Mock has written about this months ago (agreeing with Obama’s playoff stance) – but I am curious about this stuff more now that it’s an actual possibility that the government may be intervening. When I see the words Justice Department and College Football in the same headline, it becomes a bit of a head-scratcher for me. And, I figure that there’s no better place than to have a discussion about this than right here at COTR.

    So, enlighten me with your opinions, clever and competent readers. I would like to be fully informed about this obviously very critical, life-or-death issue before August 2010 rolls around….

    Oh yeah, and I know I could’ve put about a gazillion different pictures of Obama and a football at the top of this entry, but the picture of Kerry made me giggle. A lot.