I don't watch a lot of mainstream television, mainly because I appreciate my brain cells, and also because the majority of celebrities today provoke an involuntary, physical response in me to punch them square in the face.  I know my limitations and I embrace my faults, so I tend to stick with SpongeBob and the Discovery Channel.  Because they're FAR more enriching.

That's just me.

So, I had to read about an apparent feud between Nicki Minaj and Mariah Carey, which I did so today, and I was a bit horrified to learn that there are people in this country who GIVE AN ACTUAL CRAP about said feud.  That is frightening in and of itself, if we're just talking merely about normal, everyday people.  But what's even MORE frightening?  Our POTUS....Dear Leader himself....the Celebrident?

Yep, Obama has weighed in on said feud.  

Why no.  I'm not kidding.  I'm really, really not kidding.

Here's Obama on the Michael Yo show, doing what Obama does best (and that's everything but RUNNING THE FREAKIN COUNTRY AND BEING AN ACTUAL LEADER, in case you didn't know):

Like all of Obama's interviews with the media who sit on his lap and ask for daily cookies, this one was no different. Mr. Yo asked him the tough, compelling questions we all come to expect from our glorious, American media.  In this case, it was about the Mariah/Nicki feud, and Obama had another one of his liberal-intellectually-elite answers:

"I think that they are going to be able to sort it out, I am confident," the president reassured. "I'm all about bringing people together, working for the same cause, I think both outstanding artists are going to be able to make sure that they're moving forward and not going backwards."

Let's recap, shall we?  I'm just a chick who lives in Indiana - you know, a chick with a full-time job, a husband, kids, a few dogs.  I'm your average, everyday Jane Q. Taxpayer.  And I knew absolutely nothing about said feud.  You know why?  I simply don't have time to give a rat's ass about Mariah and Nicki's little chick fight, because, well, I WORK. But the President of the United States? He knows all about it.  Which is odd, seeing as how he hasn't had time to concern himself with his Jobs Council or to meet with Netanyahu or to prepare AT ALL for his presidential debates sans his trusty teleprompter.  And don't get me started on how he hasn't had a BUDGET in three years or how he just isn't aware of what happened to those four people in Libya.  Just ask Pat Smith, the mother of the slain State Department official.  I'm sure she'll be thrilled to hear that Obama doesn't know squat about her son's murder, while concerning himself with such overpaid-and-undertalented celebrity attention whores instead.  You know, in his vast spare time.

Yep. I'll let you ponder that for a minute.

And then ponder this - Last Thursday, Obama had a 53% POSITIVE approval rating.  Which brings me back to my post title.

So, can someone please hurry up and pass me that bottle now?

Thanks.