Daisy’s Review Of Obama Speech Number 69,352,791 (You May Want To Grab A Snack For This One)
Written by Daisy // September 9, 2009 // Uncategorized // 26 Comments
So, Mock made me watch the healthcare speech. She’s busy watching “So You Think You Can Dance” and “Glee” tonight, so I was tasked with sitting through it and refraining from poking my eyes out with forks. (My eyes are still intact – thanks for asking.)
First off, let me just get the basics out of the way:
- It was way too long. I could’ve shortened it by about 45 minutes had I been given editing rights.
- Nancy Pelosi’s nostrils looked markedly huge this evening. That disturbed me. And she still clapped like a cymbal-clad monkey on some sort of upper. My instinct to punch her in the face rose as the hour progressed, but that’s neither here nor there.
- Michelle Obama’s Pepto-Bismol-BOW-inspired outfit was heinous. Seriously – what in the hell is up with the bows lately? Can we get a stylist to please intervene? I can forgive an obnoxious, ill-placed bow once, but come on…
- Joe Biden looked as if he needed some No-Doze. I was waiting for him to nod off, but he surprisingly never did. It was very Weekend at Bernie’s.
Now on to the speech:
First of all, Bo lost me a bit with his first appeal at being completely narcissistic when he said something along the lines of “I can stand here and confidently say that I’ve turned the economy around.” Um, hello delusional. Do you even live in this country?
That sort of started me off on the wrong foot as a listener, as boldfaced lies usually irritate me that early in a speech. But I continued to listen (because Mock forced me to, as you recall). The beginning of the preach-fest was your basic Obama blah-blah rhetorical crap, talking about how there have been “scare tactics” used and a “blizzard of charges” brought against his plan. Then, predictably, he treated everyone in the room like five-year olds when he said, “The time for bickering is over.”
So I figured with that whole condescending demand, he’d get into more detail. Well, not quite. But here’s what he proposed tonight (again) just so we’re all on the same page:
1. People who have insurance will keep it (we’ve heard that before). Our insurance will be BETTER because of his plan, insurance companies won’t be able to place caps on coverage or cut our insurance when we get sick. The plan will also limit out-of-pocket expenses. Again, yawn.
2. People without insurance will get “quality, affordable choices” and be able to “shop at competitive prices.”
3. If you still can’t afford those “affordable choices,” then you’ll get a tax credit based on your need.
4. Individuals will be required to carry health insurance – just like car insurance. If you don’t, you’ll be penalized. However, 95% of all small businesses are exempt from these requirements. (Um, OK.)
5. He is still in favor of the public option (of course, this was buried somewhere in the middle of the speech, but it was there, nonetheless).
Then, he said something really, very important (that got a HUGE groan from the right):
“There remain some significant details to be ironed out….”
Still, Bo? Really? Are you freakin’ kidding me?
He progressed into what he referred to as the controversies and falsehoods of the plan, which included the following:
- Bureaucrats killing off senior citizens. Bo says this is false…again.
- The plan will insure illegal immigrants. Bo also says this is false….again. And several Republicans called B.S. on that (which in turn invoked an I-think-I-smelled-something-rotten Pelosi face response that was comical and therefore, my favorite part of the evening).
- No federal dollars will fund abortions. Um, if you say so, Bo.
- There will be no government takeover. (But he does still favor a public option. See above.)
What I was waiting for – and what pretty much every Republican in the room was waiting for as well – was some talk about malpractice insurance reform. He spoke of that for approximately 5 seconds, at which time he got a standing ovation from the right in the room. However, he didn’t specify HOW he’d handle that beyond asking his Health and Human Services Secretary to “work on it.”
Wow. I feel better NOW. Thanks.
Of course, he also got a jab in about Bush and how he basically caused the deficit, made himself the martyr, then went on to say that this plan wouldn’t add a DIME MORE to the deficit, as he would use “savings within the current healthcare system” to pay the $900 BILLION bill (over 10 years) for all of this. He said that Medicare won’t be used to pay for it at all, but revenues from drug and insurance companies will. He’ll appoint an independent commission to look into wasteful spending, find it, and oila! It’ll all be paid for.
Insert puppies and sunshine and butterfly kisses here.
He encouraged all the people in the room to “come to me with a proposal, and I’ll listen…my door is always open.” But we all know that’s a bunch of absolute horse crap.
Then, he threatened the room when he said, “if you misrepresent what’s in this plan, we’ll call you out.”
Scare tactics were the blow before the final blow, as he used the crisis-technique to say that if we don’t pass this plan, the deficit will grow, families will go bankrupt, and PEOPLE WILL DIE….
Aaaaand, last but certainly not least, he did EXACTLY what I knew he would do – he ended with the fireworks show – the Ted Kennedy plea. The Holy Grail of left-wing tactics. After all, folks…Never let a dead Senator go to waste.
“Ted Kennedy believed that this was the year for healthcare reform.” (Cue Nancy Pelosi looking as if there were tears in her eyes. I successfully held back the urge to vomit.)
“I still believe….I still believe….” ended the preach-fest, taking me back to my days as a pianist in a Southern Methodist church. And then the hallelujahs and amens finally ended.
I still don’t know the hows. I still don’t see how he’s going to reform the malpractice problem in this country. I still don’t see how he’s going to come up with $900 billion merely in “waste.”
Yep. One hour of my life. Gone. And, I’ll never get it back. Thanks, Mock. 
26 Comments on "Daisy’s Review Of Obama Speech Number 69,352,791 (You May Want To Grab A Snack For This One)"
you need to put together a slide show with your commentary im sure it would be more hilarious then actually watching the whole speech
Apparently, that “47 million uninsured Americans” turned into 30 million tonight.
Huh.
Give it a couple more weeks, and he’ll get it down to where it ACTUALLY IS!!
Pure brilliance wrapped in sass as always…
I adore you people!
ROCK ON, CHICKS!
The oratory was great as usual, and as usual the speech was mostly devoid of content. Where content was provided, it was close to absurd. One example will suffice: according to the President, only 5% of all people needing insurance would choose the public option. The public option is presumably to provide competition and choice. This 5% is for people who cannot afford other forms of insurance (i.e. would have to be subsidized). Yet, we are told that this public option would be self-sustaining. It is fair to ask: HOW? As to the competition and choice – it is hard to imagine how a little 5% option could compete with the remaining 95% of choices.
What the President should have said is this: we need TORT reform; we need insurance available across state lines; we need transparency in what medical costs really are; we need individual Health Savings Accounts; we need to TAX (dirty word, that)health benefits that employers provide to employees (it is an income after all) – that INCLUDES the health insurance plans the unions enjoy. Above all, the President should have been honest: we cannot insure MORE people, for LESS money and offer BETTER care. It is dishonest to pretend otherwise. As to using profits of corporations to finance health care, he should have told the Americans that if we confiscated all the profits of all the greedy insurance companies, the money would pay for FOUR days of health care for all Americans. Adding in the profits of the 10 most rapacious US drug companies would pay for another SEVEN days. Confiscating all the profits of ALL American companies in EVERY industry would cover fewer than FIVE months of the US health-care expenses (The Atlantic, September 2009).
Alas, the President said none of these things.
Oh, and I was impressed by the opening statement: I want to be the LAST President who pushes Health Care reform. I take it as meaning that his plan will be so perfect that never again will there be a need to change anything in it. In the old country this sort of arrogance is called “chutzpah.”
So, the President went back to the basics, his basics: Marshmallows and Butt-wind.
Good to know he’s back on the campaign trail and we can count on not hearing any specifics any time before the bill actually passes.
I tried to watch but couldn’t. As soon as he said the economy is doing good now, or something along those lines, I found myself swearing and thinking about what a lying %$$%#$% he is. I was thinking that there are brain dead people that will believe him and I was just getting too worked up. Could not stomach it and had to turn the channel.
Billy Flynn…er…Obama was back in action. Problem is none of his numbers crunch. Oh and he isn’t lying about the illegal coverage. That is because the next big push coming through Congress is amnesty.
genetics 73: “we need to TAX (dirty word, that)health benefits that employers provide to employees (it is an income
after all) –”
You lost me. I would have no problem taxing medical benefits as income if people were given the choice to take it in cash. But they aren’t. You either take the insurance or you are essentially taking a pay cut. Furthermore it is absolutely unconstitutional to require people to buy insurance through their employer, then tax them for it. That it is the McCain idiocy, AND IT WILL NOT BRING COSTS DOWN! What is more, unless you then tax Medicare benefits and SS, the tax you want will also be discriminatory, since Medicare and SS benefits far out strip what recipients pay into it…EVEN WITH INTEREST ADDED IN. So essentially they are getting freebies, inadequate as those freebies are, and they should be taxed.
I will leave it at that, but I could actually triple Daisy’s blog post on this. One thing though folks, bear in mind, death panels are the natural economic progression of government insurance, whether it is stated or unstated. Simply deny care, and voila…you have a death panel. And you will, because that is an easy cost cutting decision. After all we all gotta die sometime, and in the immortal words of Scrooge, “Get on with it and reduce the surface population!”
You don’t need me to tell you his bull crap on the economy is bull crap. You guys are plenty smart.
Instead of watching his speech I played games online. I knew you would have it all wrapped up in an article I could read in a few minutes. (3 to be exact) Sorry you had to waste your evening on him.
Thanks you for again delivering a very well written article.
I love you, Daisy. I missed the speech because I was watching Coraline (I have my priorities too
).
I can sum up the speech pretty quickly:
‘The time for engaging in scare tactics is over, so pass my POS bill or everyone will die.’
-B.H.O.
I’m wondering if the teleprompters required a dip in bleach after the dog and pony show. Your reporting of the nod-fest was brilliant and hilarious.
Thanks for taking the bullet for us all Daisy. You’re made of stronger stuff than I.
I think you should become the national speech writer–this was the best stuff I’ve read in a long time and it was true and to the point with nothing held back! Bravo!
Ok, to the speech—
And yes, I agree 100% with what you said–I went into watching that dog and pony show last night not expecting anything different from this administration and I was right….and yah, had to take a shower afterwards, I was feeling so icky!
Ok, I admit I’m slow on the uptake today – migraine. Did he actually say people would be penalized if they did not carry health insurance?! Was he referring to companies, or to individuals? Either way, I thought that in the USA you had the right to your own body, whether you wanted insurance or not. Did I miss something here?
Daisy, you’re a chick with one strong stomach to take this, pregnant and all! I just couldn’t bring myself to watch. I have no tolerance for stupidity. I watched and read about it today instead. I got to watch So You Think You Can Dance last night – my favorite show!
Laurel:
“You lost me. I would have no problem taxing medical benefits as income if people were given the choice to take it in cash. But they aren’t. You either take the insurance or you are essentially taking a pay cut.”
Thanks for reading my post carefully – it’s more than can be said of many. My argument was incomplete, written in the heat of the moment. What I should have said (in agreement with you) was this: instead of employers getting tax deduction for the insurance for the employees, the equivalent sums should be given to the workers as salary or wage; this would make it possible for the employee to accept or refuse insurance without an immediate monetary loss. I still believe that having to accept the responsibility for one’s own health care premium would make the individual think about what is and is not worth insuring against. That said, it is a fact that everyone (including the “uninsured”) actually has some sort of health insurance already; what we are haggling about is the price and who’s paying for it. As I said in my post “we cannot insure MORE people, for LESS money and offer BETTER care.” Universal care will either cost more or offer less; there’s no alternative to that.
Since when does brilliance come in the form of making fun of the way people look, then repeating practically verbatim what every conservative television and radio host in this country says?
Almost as brilliant as a grown Congressman calling the President a liar as he speaks to the nation. What’s that you always say? Oh yeah. Stay classy.
To Genetics, kudos for having something real to contribute to the discussion, other than “I watched prime time instead,” and “Obama said he isn’t going to insure the Mexicans or kill my grandma, but he’s a big liar!” I agree with you on every point, though I do believe there are uninsured who do fall through the cracks of the current system. I believe this can be remedied without the implementation of Obama’s plan, however. This, “we need TORT reform; we need insurance available across state lines; we need transparency in what medical costs really are;” is exactly right. Hope you don’t object to the token “liberal” approving of your comments.
I didn’t watch the BS session last night for health reasons. First, it makes by blood pressure soar. Second, I was certain I would vomit.
genetics 73: Thanks for the clarification!
Megan: My sister is one of those who ‘falls through the crack’. Currently she pays cash for all medical and dental. It is currently cheaper for her to pay cash, and she learned to dicker real quick, than to pay even more in taxes or the fine that Baucas proposes.
In our society there is always going to be people who fall through the cracks. As I said earlier…you can lead a horse to water but you can’t make them drink. And that is despite the enormous amounts of entitlements and charity programs we have.
Megan: P.S. I don’t think you are a token anything.
Genetics73, you make a good and valid point. If individuals chose their own insurance plans, and fully paid for them themselves, people would have a much greater awareness of costs, differnces in coverage, etc. I bet most people could give you more details about their cellular plan, or cable TV package than their health care coverage.
The reason we will not see this during this administartion is due to unions. If health coverage was not provided through employers, unions would not be able to negotiate their members’ plans. And if unions can’t control health care negotiations, its one less reason to even belong to a union. If union membership declines, there are fewer sheep to lead to the polls on election day, and fewer dollars to throw at liberal candidates. (The official tally of SEIU contributions to Obama alone totaled over $27 Million. This does not include the hours that SEIU employees were told to log as “volunteers” in his campaign.)
Ultimately, there is no simple fix for health care. A real solution requires many moving parts–tort reform, a re-vamping of the insurance industry, more transparancy on the part of providers and drug companies, and consumer-driven competition, just to name a few.
Megan,
I am still exorcising the demons of liberal approval you have bestowed on me.
We may not see eye to eye on some aspects of politics, but it is good to see that we can remain civil and disagree without being disagreeable.
Reader J: One of the reasons they are pushing government health care is the unions are in way over their head in their pensions promises.
Megan -
You think I lifted ANY part of my entry from conservative talk radio? Are you kidding me? I sat through an HOUR of that sh*t so I could write an entry from the bottom of my suffering heart. How dare you insinuate that I didn’t lose that one whole hour of my life – and then ANOTHER half hour to craft that entry. That hurts. Really.
Oh, and yeah – the “grown Congressman” called him a liar, which totally isn’t cool. In a civilized society, that is lacking in the class department – I’ll give you that. But, I won’t lie to YOU when I say that I was thinking “You LIE!” in my head pretty much the whole hour. I mean, it was my inside voice and all, but nevertheless, I was thinking it. Because, yeah. Obama lies. A LOT.
But thanks again for continuing to gobble up and support the mindless and unoriginal content on this site!