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Monthly Archive for June, 2009

“We’re Going To Let The Process Work Its Way Through”

Seriously. Seriously? Seriously.

HOW DOES THIS DUFUS STILL HAVE A JOB?

BEHOLD – Bobby Gibbs being asked if Obama’s campaign pledge to not raise taxes for those people making 250k or less is still accurate. If anyone out there can translate what in the holy hell Bobby’s answer is, I’d appreciate it. I THINK that, when whittled down to the bare bones, the literal translation for the garbled mess of words that escaped his lips is “no” but I got lost somewhere in between the words “hypothetical” and “process.”

Anyone?

I gotta hand it to the press corp on this one. They didn’t let Bobby get away with much here.

Way To Go, Minnesota

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This is your new representative.  It’s all over and done with, and Al Franken has officially been declared the 58th Democratic Senator.

Let’s just really let this sink in.  AL FRANKEN, pictured above, is a SENATOR.  Like – in the SENATE. 

I hope you all realize that anytime he’s ever in the news for any reason ever, THIS is the photo I’ll be using.

Why Yes, I Am A Capitalist Pig

Our store has been updated! Several new items are available, including this fabulous new onesie, made especially for Rachel, our due-in-February reader:

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Now go on and perpetuate the fact that we’re capitalist pigs.

And without further ado, I now return you to your regularly scheduled political mocking.

Really?

Thought for the day: How many lemmings do you think are buying these right this second?

OOOOOH. Shiny.

“Science Is Being Decided At The Presidential Level”

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According to this, the EPA miiiiiiiiight be suppressing a report which questions the validity of the “science” behind global warming.

Huh.  Now, why on earth would they do that?  What possible consequences could a silly little 98 page report written by an economist at the EPA have that would necessitate his boss instructing him to cease work on that line of research?

Oh wait.  This wouldn’t have anything to do with that insignificant, trivial and meaningless piece of legislation that passed the House late last week, would it?

Well, let’s look at the chain of events:

1.  Alan Carlin, an EPA analyst, co-authors a report which argues that the EPA is using outdated information to conclude that regulating gases will reduce global warming, and in fact points out that as atmospheric CO2 levels have increased, global temps have actually declined over the last 11 years. 

2.  Carlin’s boss tells Carlin via email (emails have now been made public), that his report information will not be included into the comprehensive EPA findings.  Boss orders Carlin to stop working on the climate change issue altogether.  

3.  Carlin responds back to his boss via email and says that his report findings are ”valid, significant” and “would be critical to the EPA finding.” 

4.  Carlin’s boss responds the next day to let Carlin know that his report will not be forwarded for inclusion into the EPA official findings. His message says in part, “The administrator and the administration has decided to move forward on endangerment, and your comments do not help the legal or policy case for this decision. I can only see one impact of your comments given where we are in the process, and that would be a very negative impact on our office.” 

5.  Carlin’s boss sends him a follow up email which instructs Carlin to ”move on to other issues and subjects.  I don’t want you to spend any additional EPA time on climate change. No papers, no research, etc., at least until we see what EPA is going to do with climate.”

Fast forward to now.  Senator James Inhofe (R-OK) is ordering an investigation into this whole report suppression thing.  He says, “He came out with the truth. They don’t want the truth at the EPA.  We’re going to expose it.”  Apparently, the email exchanges between Carlin and his boss have piqued the interest of Congressional Republicans, because they do seem to suggest some sort of political interference.  Reps Sensenbrenner (R-WI) and Darrell Issa (R-CA) wrote to the EPA requesting them to reopen the “comment period” on the official finding.  They said that the EPA was demonstrating an “agency culture set in a predetermined course.” 

Further, they wrote, “It documents at least one instance in which the public was denied access to significant scientific literature and raises substantial questions about what additional evidence may have been suppressed.”  Issa then said the administration is “actively seeking to withhold new data in order to justify a political conclusion.” 

Sensenbrenner added, “I’m sure it was very inconvenient for the EPA to consider a study that contradicted the findings it wanted to reach.” 

The EPA has refused to reopen the comment period.  SHOCK!

Carlin said it best when he said that he’s concerned that he’s seeing ”science being decided at the presidential level.”  He went on, “Now Mr. Obama is in effect directly or indirectly saying that CO2 causes global temperatures to rise and that we have to do something about it. … That’s normally a scientific judgment and he’s in effect judging what the science says. We need to look at it harder.” 

Wait.  Someone is suggesting that we actually consider the science carefully before throwing together a massive bill that Congress doesn’t have time to read which will in effect destroy tons of jobs and raise everyone’s taxes, all for a cause that we’re not entirely sure really fixes anything in the first place? 

What a wackjob.

Attention All Wackjob Right Wing Extremists With Stockholm Syndrome (And You Know Who You Are)

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It’s that time again. Time for a Tea Party. And, to just keep Janet Napolitano paranoid and Janeane Garofalo irritated and looking as if she’s perpetually smelling something really vile, Mock and I will be at our local Tea Party this weekend to protest the latest Cap and Tax monkey crap legislation – as well as all the other monkey crap legislation this administration has and is attempting to hurry through Congress just so no one actually reads it, of course.

Not in the loop on where your local Tea Party will be? Try checking out this site and looking for your state’ s event.

If you’re sick and tired of the government speeding along legislation and spending like there’s no tomorrow (at every taxpayer’s expense), then get your butts out there and make your voices heard. It’s all about grassroots, people…

And while you start planning your Independence Day Tea Party agenda in your neck of the woods, I’ll leave you with a few of my favorite Thomas Jefferson quotes. Frightening as it may be, these are all pretty apropos these days…

~Government big enough to supply everything you need is big enough to take everything you have … The course of history shows that as a government grows, liberty decreases.

~Experience hath shewn, that even under the best forms [of government] those entrusted with power have, in time, and by slow operations, perverted it into tyranny.

~Most bad government has grown out of too much government.

~The democracy will cease to exist when you take away from those who are willing to work and give to those who would not.

Time to wake up, America…

Obama’s New Defense Plan

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Earlier today, a clever and competent reader (from California even!!!) sent me a link to this editorial, which describes how Obama ’s Democratic buddies in Congress tried to deny New York the funding it needs to defend itself against the threat of nuclear weapons.  Apparently, Obama’s aides as well as Homeland Security Secretary Napolitano were LOUD AND PROUD about wanting to deny $40 million to NYC, which would be used to pay for radiological detectors on the highways, bridges, tunnels and waterways going in and out of the city.  So, I was reading that article, and within moments of finishing it I came upon this photo, and immediately thought that perhaps these high-tech flyswatters are Obama’s new answer to defense for our country.  I mean, the surly puppies can only go so far, right?

Anyway, the measure to restore the funding to the city passed with a vote of 282 to 148, and hopefully you’re sitting down right now, because I’m sure it will come as a TOTAL SURPRISE to you that a majority of Democrats voted to kill it, and an overwhelming number of Republicans voted to save it.  One particularly imbecilic justification for killing the bill that David Price (D -NC) gave was that it was just ”an earmark for New York.”  I’m not making this up.

Apparently, we can afford earmarks to figure out why pigs in Iowa smell bad, but protecting one of our nation’s most important cities? Not important.

But our military has flyswatters, you guys.  So, you know, we have that.

Sotomayor Shows (Again) That Her Rulings Aren’t Really The Supreme Court’s Cup Of Tea

According to this,  the Supreme Court ruled today in favor of the white Connecticut firefighters who were denied promotions because of their race.  This ruling (even though it was a narrow 5/4 split) gives me faith that there are still reasonable and practical people in the highest court, because when Judge Sotomayor decided AGAINST the firefighters in a lower court, it was one of the dumbest rulings ever.

Quick background if this story is new to you:  City firefighters in New Haven, CT take a test in order to qualify for promotion.  But at the last testing cycle, only white test takers and two Hispanic test takers ended up passing well enough to earn the promotions.  So, in their infinite wisdom, the city THREW OUT THE RESULTS of the test, because they were worried that they might get sued by the black test takers.   So in essence, the city discriminated against the test passers, for passing the test.  Those firefighters sued, and rightly so, but Judge Sotomayor’s Court of Appeals said, basically, “No – the city was right.  The test isn’t fair because not enough minorities passed it.”  Because apparently it’s better to dumb down tests instead of actually using the results.   

The main plaintiff,  Frank Ricci, testified that he spent a bunch of money in preparation for the test and studied for months.  He’s dyslexic, so he even had audio tapes made of the test materials and listened to them during his work commute.

Justice Anthony Kennedy in the Supreme Court said, “Fear of litigation alone cannot justify an employer’s reliance on race to the detriment of individuals who passed the examinations and qualified for promotions.  And, he went on, “…there is no evidence — let alone the required strong basis in evidence — that the tests were flawed because they were not job-related or because other, equally valid and less discriminatory tests were available to the city.”

And that’s exactly right.  Joining Kennedy in his voice of reason were Chief Justice John Roberts, and Justices Samuel Alito, Antonin Scalia and Clarence Thomas.

Sotomayor’s ruling record is going to be the talk of the town over the next few weeks until she’s either sworn in or rejected.   Should be some interesting debate, to say the least!

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Gangster Government

Michele Bachmann is awesome. What appeals to me most about her is something I believe we have in common – a complete incability to bullsh*t.

In this clip, she’s discussing the czar-like structure of this administration. Specifically, she’s talking about the Government Motors (formerly known as “GM”) takeover and the way that things are being handled now – very similar to a “gangster” type structure. It’s mind-boggling that America is actually in this position.

Since the government takeover, private businesses, corporations, and contracts have been replaced by a cartel of gangster-like authorities who dole out handouts and pardons, if you will, to the dealers who are begging the best for a handout. It’s like a pee-on in the Al Capone era, appealing to him for mercy on their business – just to keep a little shred of what they’ve worked so hard to achieve. And yes, I just compared Capone to the present administration. Indeed I did.

The most baffling story Bachmann presents is one of a woman who had a 90-year old dealership. She received a freakin’ Fed Ex from the government, basically asking her to sign her name to give up her business. And on top of that, they want her customer list – presumably so they can just hand it over to her competitor down the street.

Call it what you want, but this is clearly un-American. It’s a bunch of monkey crap, and I love Michele Bachmann for calling it what it is – gangster government.

Disney Adds Creepy Obama Animatronic Dude To Hall of Presidents Attraction

About three years ago, I went to Disney World with my family and sat through the Hall of Presidents show.  It had a little more significance to me than it did when I was a kid, but on the flip side, it also seems less real as an adult. 

Seeing as how I was just there a few years ago, the memory of it is not that far removed. So, when I saw that they recently made a Presidential update to the attraction, I had to see what Disney’s version of an animatronic Obama looked like.

My first reaction is that he looks downright creepy. And, more importantly, where in the heck is his teleprompter? It’s as if he’s missing a crucial limb…

I Love This SO MUCH

You know what this is? This is Michelle Malkin and others inviting that horrid beast of a person, Janeane Garafalo, to one of the many Tea Parties being held across the country on the 4th of July. And it’s completely fabulous.

I hope that Janeane’s response to this invitation includes her making a total ass of herself on the Keith Olbermann show, because I would really really love to post that.

LOVE.

Eengleesh Is The Language Of The United States

A clever and competent reader sent me this video, and even though I am not a fan of country music nor am I a fan of the way that this blond chick pronounces the word “English” as “Eengleesh,” I am a HUGE fan of the song lyrics.

Enjoy.

Stimulus and TARP Money? Aw Screw It, Let’s All Just Get Drunk…

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So, you know all that TARP money that we’re all paying for in taxes over the next gazillion years or so?  Turns out, according to this article, “that it is virtually impossible to keep track of. Untold billions – perhaps hundreds of billions of dollars – has been handed out to people and companies who don’t deserve it and had no business getting it in the first place.”

And you know what one of those places are?  Captain Morgan Rum.  Yep. 

How did this happen, you ask?  Well, for starters, the legislation – the handouts – were impossible to track.  And, it was rushed legislation, of course (go figure).  The real logistics behind the madness, though, are as follows:

“In June 2008, U.S. Virgin Islands Governor John deJongh Jr. agreed to give London-based Diageo Plc billions of dollars in tax incentives to move its production of Captain Morgan rum from one U.S. island — Puerto Rico — to another, namely St. Croix. DeJongh says he had no idea his deal would help make the world’s largest liquor distiller the most unlikely beneficiary of the emergency Troubled Asset Relief Program approved by Congress just four months later.”

What kills me is that this is just ONE example of where funds are being thrown haphazardly.  At THE TAXPAYERS’ expense.  What about all that spendiddlydimulus money? I know I myself haven’t seen a penny of that doing any good in my community, my city, or my state.  I haven’t benefitted one iota.  Yet, I will be paying for it – my children, and my grandchildren will be paying for it – for generations to come.

Am I the only person who suddenly feels the urge to go drink a bottle of rum?

Surly Puppies (And Fox News Anchors)

Daisy and I are enjoying a girlfriend’s getaway at West Baden Springs resort (which you can read all about on The Mock Dock) this weekend, celebrating (?) me turning 40, but also mourning the stupid decision made by Congress yesterday, and so we’re going to keep this post brief and light.

Hey – have you guys ever noticed that Julie Banderas on Fox News is ALWAYS mad?  Always.  Like – she just seems perpetually annoyed at everything she’s reporting ever.   Behold:

I think Julie Banderas is vying for a place on the surly puppy list. But she will NEVER beat the original surly puppy – Daisy’s dog Tess Larue. BEHOLD:

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2010 Cannot Get Here Soon Enough

The Democrats failed the American people BIG TIME today. They passed the stupid Cap and Tax legislation, without even reading it, and without allowing the public to see legislation online as they’d promised. AGAIN.

The fact that something this significant can just get pushed through because a bunch of Democratic nimrods want to get it done before they go on Fourth of July holiday is bordering on criminal.

70% of Americans want to drill for oil on our own turf. SEVENTY PERCENT. And only 18% are dead set against it, with the rest undecided. But instead of doing what the majority of Americans know is right, we’re now going to force tax penalties on energy companies who will then pass along those ridiculous penalties to all of us. And we’ll lose a couple million jobs in the process. Good job, Democratic voters. Nicely done.

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I have a lot of hope about 2010 elections right now, because this legislation is going to dramatically affect people who actually BELIEVED Obama when he said he was going to cut their taxes. The rest of us, who didn’t fall for his crap, are left here to suffer the consequences right along with the folks who DID, and I would suspect there’s going to be a fairly significant number of people who are going to be feeling some serious buyer’s remorse about the clowns they elected to represent them.

But the damage that will be caused between now and then is going to be enormous, and as optmistic of a person as I am, I still can’t fathom how new leadership could even begin to pick up the pieces. The massive healthcare government takeover is next, and it too will be forced through without anyone actually getting a chance to read it carefully.

Obama wasn’t kidding when he talked about CHANGE. It’s just too bad that not enough people realized what kind of changes were in store for them.

Congratulations Liberals…

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You’ve managed to make me shake my head once again. And by shaking my head, I mean me asking myself, “did I read that right? Seriously? Really?”

Enter two liberal Democrats – Rep. Maxine Waters, D-Calif., and Appropriations Chairman David Obey, D-Wis. They got into a fight over an earmark. And it wasn’t the kind of fight you’d see, say, lawyers have all formal-like in a courtroom with big words and pomp and circumstance, but more so of a fight you’d see high school girls have. In the lunchroom.

According to this article, these two have been feuding over the fact that Obey won’t approve an earmark “for a public school employment training center in Los Angeles that was named after Waters when she was a state representative.” He was noted as being against “monuments to me.” In fact, that sense of ethics and taking the high ground really overtook them both when they started bickering on the Chamber floor. The words flew, it was like a scene from a bad high school movie where teenage girls are squawking like rabid hens, then my favorite part of it is when they retreated back to their little posses/colleagues for full-on teenage girl clique support.

Waters was overheard as telling her buddies, “He touched me!”

And, that’s basically when I did the whole shaking-my-head thing.

These people were elected. By votes. From actual voters.

I’d just like everyone to ponder that for a second…

Indiana Democrat Leaders SUCK

Hey – remember that day that Daisy and I kissed the governor, and we told you that the House Democrats threw a big hissy fit about letting regular citizens speak at their meeting because they thought it was “staged” by Mitch Daniels’ staffers since an email had been sent out encouraging people to come and support his budget?

Yeah. You may not have heard that those same democrats who threw the hissy fit went ahead and sent out their very own email to their supporters encouraging them to do the very same thing recently. So SURPRISE! Democrats showed hypocrisy. Imagine that!

In today’s news, those same Democrats are quite possibly about to shut our state government down. And it’s because they are so blinded by their own stupid agenda that they can’t see the harm they’re doing. It’s absolutely outrageous. Once again, however, Our Man Mitch has come forward to explain, in no uncertain terms, what a shut-down would look like, and why it’s potentially happening. And you can listen to the audio of his awesomeness here.

For those of you who prefer reading to listening, the unofficial transcript is after the jump.  I am amazed at the level of utter incompetence that the IN Democratic leadership is showing. 

HATE.

Continue reading ‘Indiana Democrat Leaders SUCK’

It’s Luau Time at the Obama White House!

This is breaking news, people.  I repeat – breaking news.  The White House had a luau.

And in the midst of the First Lady doing a little hula dance, White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs was in a dunk tank, where the Press Corps tried to dunk him.

Isn’t it all just adorable summer fun?

PS – North Korea wants to wipe us all off the face of the planet, Iran is laughing at us maniacally, Cap and Tax may add even more to our taxes and kill MORE jobs, the unemployment rate is still way up, I haven’t seen a lick of benefit from that spendiddlydimulus, and Obama is planning on socializing American medicine.

Happy Friday, everyone!

Just A Friendly Reminder That Cap And Tax Is A Lousy Idea And You Should Be Calling Your Congressman To Tell Him/Her So Immediately.

I know, I know. Daisy JUST talked about this. But it bears repeating.

It doesn’t really get much plainer than when Obama himself basically says, “Yeah y’all – energy costs are going to totally skyrocket under my plan. Good luck with that.”

But wild-eyed Nancy Pelosi wants to push this through so she can have another clapping party.

Make sure to attend your local 4th of July Tea Party, you guys! It may be too late to prevent the passage of Cap and Tax nonsense, but you’re still making a statement. And who knows – if you come to the Indianapolis one, you might just see/hear us there. ;)

Happy Birthday Mock!

I’m a little late with this (we still have a few hours left to celebrate), but I’d like to wish my partner-in-crime, Mock, a very happy, everlasting 39th birthday today. It was a monumental day for her – the next best monumental birthday since 21, really - and I hope it was wonderful.

In honor of her friendship, wit, zest for life, and snarky charm, I’m posting the following surly puppy with attitude.

Happy Birthday, Mock.  You go on, girl. :-)

awesome